The Sukot festival arrived. I was staying in BeiJala next to Bethlehem. The day of her arrival in Jerusalem came. I immediately emailed her. I waited with baited breath for her reply. O man! I still remember my shock!
“There is nothing wrong with your theology. You are just self-centered! I don’t have time to meet with you…”
If a dagger would have penetrated the depth of my flesh and bones ten thousand times it would have been less painful than such cruel, heartless sentence! What on earth had I done to deserve such?
I turned off the computer. I threw myself on the bed. I exclaimed, “I quit! I never want to write one single word anymore! I want out of this wagon!”
Most especial Sabbath…
Saturday, October 03, 2009 (1:21am).
The sting of the shock ceased. The silence of the moment permeated the room. I heard,
“My Thia, My beloved, open the door of your chamber for I am knocking. I come to take you higher up to My Mountain to be alone with Me.”
Master, my door is open or is it not? Give me the eyes to see the door of my heart and the ability to open it wide to You.
“My beloved, in your heart there are many chambers and I have come to inhabit those chambers, but, now I wish to come in, in the most intimate and deepest chamber where no one else should be allowed.”
Master! My Beloved Master! By all means! Take the key that I can’t find and open the door for my secret chambers! By all means! My Beloved, take the key to my secret chambers and keep it as Your eternal property! I want no one else to invade such intimate quarters!
“My beloved, My Thia, the key to your secret chambers is now in My possession and I am taking residence in that deepest and most Set Apart chamber of your heart! No one shall disturb you any longer, whether they come or go, whether they call or not, whether they are kind or un-kind, whether they are friend or foe, whether they are your flesh and blood or perfect strangers, NO ONE should ever disturb you anymore!”
O my Master! Are You now taking me to Your Mountain top? What am I to do? What am I to feel? What am I to think? Tell me my Master! Do unto me as it is pleasing in Your sight!