Yes, I have penned down the multitude of pages, but! Every single one of those pages has come from You. I get so discouraged with my lack of ability to adhere to the rules imposed to be a good writer, but!
When I least expect it, as I struggle to improve my writing, perhaps re-write? You bring me to read the books I have published to find out why no one has purchased or read them.
Nothing Wrong With My Books …?
I read, and? I say to myself: there is nothing wrong with this book. Don’t understand why it has flopped. Then? I go on to write some more whatever You inspire me at any given moment.
I Been In Awe Of Your Doings. Dumbfound, But! I Keep Going.
Write, publish, and optimize is my task. Here lately You added: ‘In that order.’ Why? Because when I publish, I can see what needs optimization.
Why My Reflections …?
Right now? Been going since way early around one or two this morning. I am cold and uncomfortable. Nothing is working to relieve my discomfort. So? Sitting directly in front of the heater? I began to reflect on your latest doings. Wow! I began in earnest to talk to You. I said,
‘Father? I cannot understand why I am so cold and uncomfortable and somehow discouraged with what goes on with Ahmad and my children. But You know all of that.
Regardless The Pain And Discomfort And Discouragement That I Am Going Through?
You also know that regardless the pain and discomfort and discouragement that I am going through? I refuse to doubt Your Presence within me. You are right here with me despite my inability to see or feel You.
I Have No Idea How It’s All Going To Turn Out For Me This Year.
It’s already past noon and? Nothing extraordinary has happen. Least nothing material that I can grab on to. I keep checking the emails to see what to grab to hold on to. It came to me to write an email to Robin.