Until the next post? Much love to all, thiaBasilia, Denise’s mother.
Not A Matter Of Comfort—Money—Happiness—Dream Life …?
Friday, March 22, 2019 at 6:22 am.
Oh my Father! Thanks for Your whisper in the darkness of my mind to bring me to the light of Your doings in my life for the last few days since I posted last.
Why Have I Not Been Able To Post? Momentary Depression, But!
Depression? Inevitable. I felt like I was going on reverse instead of forward. How could I have posted anything the way I was feeling?
Ha! My Comfort? To The Max. My Pain? Under Control. Suddenly?
The pangs of discomfort began with the breakage of several of my cherished trinkets, and? The breakage of the wife’s cherished gifted ceramic pot, but!
Ahmad And The Wife? Brought Maria To Visit Me ….
Maria recognized me as her Teta—grandmother, plus? I had the opportunity to break the news to the wife that her favorite pot was broke, and?
No Problem, Said The Smiling Wife. Teta, Teta, Teta Said Maria …
O what a blessing, my Father—a gift from Your heart of mercy to comfort this child of Yours. Even so?
I Refused To Be Comforted. What Did I See In The Visit? …
I saw Ahmad’s predicament. He simply cannot take care of us as he has done in the past, so? The next day I decided to take care of myself, but!
I Never Realized How Much Resentment Was In My Decision. The Results? …
No more joy in what I was doing. My apartment was in shambles waiting for help to fix it. Realizing there was no help to be had? I began by putting together the broken pot. Next?
Work On The Piece For My Desk. The Key Board And Mouse Must Be Placed Just Right …
I’m suffering with the pain in my arm for lack of the proper desk. Ahmad came to my aid with a new arrangement, but? Not enough, and? Frustration began to set in. Why? How?
I Am Human. The Human Nature Remains With Me Despite My Father’s Presence …?
So? I react as human naturally, but! I’m at the point to live an effortless life under the loving control and dominion of my Heavenly Father, and?
I Do Not Immediately Realize My Human Reactions Until I Start Feeling Bad And? …
That’s when I wind up in the hole of depression. Along comes doubts—fears—regrets even of my birth, but! That’s also when I run to my Father in the heavens and in my heart.
What Comes Next? Wow! Things Begin To Happen Magically …
Yesterday? I worked physically all day. Did most of the things I was waiting for somebody to do for me. All the time? I was in pain feeling sorry for myself for the lack of help.
By Nighttime? I Was A Wreck!
I hurt from head to toe. Woke up several times screaming in pain. Then? Woke up last around 6:00 am and? Suddenly!
My Teacher Showed. I Saw! And I Came To My Higher Sense…
O but what a blessing it is to be free even to be a human being. The funny thing? The more settled I get in my Father’s Presence, the weirdest things happen that I take for granted.
I Should Know The Drill By Now But!
My reaction? A human reaction. The minute something goes against what I am expecting? I go to pieces no matter how hard I try to understand—to let go of my hurt feelings.
Right Now? I Can’t See The Good At All …
The Internet is not working. I can’t communicate with Ahmad. Like most humans? Ahmad is only interested in justifying himself—no concern on how his behavior is hurting me, but!
What To Do? I Do Whatever I Think Is Best …
I will unplug turn off the computer. See if the computer gets in line with the Net. It seems like the whole world is against me. My Father? Maybe He is against me as well.
I Go On Riding My Own Horse In Pain And Despair …
Net is trying to come back. That’s what was going on yesterday. I quit recording. Did not come to record until Friday, March 22, 2019 at 2:54 pm. But!
I Spent The Day Reflecting As I Worked Free Of Anger …
Around 5: pm I was exhausted. I went to bed. Slept for a couple hours. I woke up in pain. It came to me to drink a cup of coffee flavored with honey and ginger.
Not A Sound From Anyone In The Family, But!
It’s now Friday, March 22, 2019 at 9:51 pm. I’m sleepy. Will write the rest when I wake up next, I hope.
As It Turned Out Before I Went To Sleep?
The same situation as many times before—emergency! Father’s heart attack! Hospital! All family on alert! Life on hold for all! And me?
Bewildered! Can’t Join In The Emergency Parade …
Am I callous and uncaring? Not at all. On the contrary. My heart is set in line with the Father Creator of our beings—waiting, waiting until their willful mounts bolt them down!
“Rest In Me.” Says He. But We Say, “No! We Will Speed Our Own Course On Horses!”
O my Father! Your words by the prophet Isaiah are coming to pass verbatim. Isaiah 30 is only too clear about what goes on amid the inhabitants of this earth as it stands now.
No Amount Of Caring, Sharing, Or Quoting, Can Stop Them Now …
Or so they chant as the exhilaration of the fast run swells their heads. The sound of laughter is deafening! The whole public in the stands loudly cheers the runners. And me?
In My Thinking? I Stand On The Tower Observing By The Power Of Your Love And Wisdom
At first? The whole parade shocked me, but now? Father is cementing me down in the reality of His love and wisdom.
Confidence. Trust. Fearless. Power To Go On Attuned To The Son …
All of that came about at the end of yesterday. Yes, physically? I hurt, but! Spiritually. Mentally. Emotionally?
That Hurt Is Under My Master’s Feet. For Me? No Defeat …
The headlines are attuned to the mentor’s issue. Get a mentor! Be a mentor! Go back to your mentor! The headlines? Like a magnet are pulling millions to amass great fortunes. Me?
Those Headlines Magnetized Me For A Bit, But Then?
My Loving Mentor from the beginning gently pulled me away from the magnet that magnetized me. What now?
Been Waiting. I Refuse To Struggle …
It’s now Saturday, March 23, 2019 at 4:05 pm. Don’t know. Don’t care to know anymore. All that struggle to learn things? Useless.
I Am Not Against Learning. I Am Against The Struggle To Learn Or Do Anything …
Well? Many times I have stated the fact that I am not a scholar nor quote Scriptures out of my head or my understanding. I quote the Scriptures as the Master reveals those to me. Quote: