I am learning these things on the daily and moment to moment basis with every stage of my physical condition. The fluctuation of my physical condition troubles me big time.
That’s Why I Keep Regressing Instead Of Progressing, Until This Morning …?
What happened this morning? I had been in the gutter of my own negative thinking since yesterday when I came into the knowledge of being a ‘lame duck’ for lack of Ahmad’s support.
Down I Went! All Day. All Night. Until The Master Lift Me Up Earlier Today …
Friday, September 13, 2019 at 10:52 pm.
Earlier today I got up from bed because I could not sleep. My mind kept churning with Ahmad’s lack of support. I kept begging for help. The answer came to my inbox.
Just Out Of Curiosity? I Clicked The Headline …
Wow! First glimpse of the people’s coming to terms with reality. I was impressed. Though that not in total agreement with the author of the post? I replied to comment. Quote:
I’m impressed! Radical Judgement of one’s self is the one thing, perhaps the only thing to solve our problems. Over and over I must radically judge myself.
Dear Reader, I will give you a bulleted summary of how this renewal of mine has been on the making for the last 45 years since 1974 when I discover the Scriptures.
- The year was 1974—I discovered the Scriptures. Got into the unknown spiritual realm. Lost my mind. Stopped reading the Scriptures.
- The year was 1979—amazing healing experience from deep wound inflicted upon me in my childhood. The result? Regain my physical health. Back in the Scriptures.
- The year was 1983—Gruesome divorce. Felt apart. Lost hope. Lost all morals. Hit the top of immoral living.
- The year was 1985—Suddenly! Unexpectedly! My whole life was run like a film strip in my view. What did I realize as I viewed the film?
- I had gone through life unaware of the secret saving power of the Spirit of the Almighty Creator of my being, taking everything and everybody for granted without consideration of anything other than my own understanding of life, and the raw feelings of my emotions.
- Restored,
- A second mental breakdown.
- Called to journal my life, but! Did not listen.
- The year was 1986—convicted. Power to quit my work. Power to listen.
- The year was 1987—began new life under my gifted friend’s care. Began to journal my life consistently.
- The year was 1992—saddest year for me, my gifted friend died. I became lost. I felt abandoned. Back to my old life of family and church.
- The year was 1994—bought property. Became sort of independent. Happy time.
- The year was 1995—depression treatment? Electric shocks. Almost destroyed me. My daughter rescued me, but that’s the year my prescription drug addiction began.
- The year was 1999—inspired to go live with family. Sold my property. Things did not work out. I felt spiritually dead.
- The year was 2001—back on my own again. Got beautiful apartment, but! Got involved in helping seniors instead of my call to journal my life as instructed to do.
- The year was 2007—that’s the year I dropped unconscious, victim of misdiagnose. Rushed to the emergency room at the point of death. Convicted. Repented. Restored.
- The year was 2008—called to go to the ‘lost sheep of Israel. Power to accept the call.
- The year was 2009—called to get out of the USA. Destination? The wilderness of people to judge me face to face.
- The year was 2015—call to go with my gifted son Ahmad. He is to be my authority while we wait for Yahushua’s return.
- The year was 2017—got the roof apartment of my dreams. My renewed life began.
- The year is now 2019—WOW! What a year it has been. This is to be the year of our jubilee, but! O well?
It Surely Doesn’t Look Like Jubilee At All! But!